Not Ashamed: Why a Maryland Lawyer Told the Supreme Court About her Abortion

Laure Ruth is the Legal Director of the Women’s Law Center of Maryland. She and 112 other female attorneys signed on to the amicus brief in Whole Women’s Health v. Cole about their own abortion experiences. I spoke with Ms. Ruth about her decision to speak publically about her own abortion and her decision to sign on to the brief. Her answers have been edited and condensed for length and clarity.

Emma Hollister: Why did you decide to sign on to the amicus brief?

Ruth Laure: It’s been an interesting evolution for me. I grew up in the 70s with a mother who supported choice, so from a young age I was aware of choice and Roe as concepts but also specifically that I always had a choice myself. But that’s not how society really saw it. Even when I had my abortion at 25, it had become apparent that I was supposed to be ashamed. I told my brothers and my partner at the time was with me when the procedure happened. He absolutely supported my right to choose for myself and supported my decision to terminate. Other than that, I didn’t tell hardly anybody in 1985 when I had the abortion. Over time a few friends knew, but it wasn’t until a party in 2003 that I really shared it publically. I was at a party with people who had been drinking and I walked into a pretty vocal argument about choice. A woman, a friend of a friend, who was anti-choice said to a room full of people that anyone who had had an abortion deserved the worst that could happen to them. When she said that it was so horribly offensive to me that I said in front of everyone, “I’ve had an abortion and I don’t think you know what you’re talking about.” The room went silent because that’s just not something people really say at parties with people that they might not know or know well. And that’s when I decided to speak up about it and be open about it when I could be. I don’t want to be in anyone’s face about it, or use the story for shock value, but I grew up aware that I had choice and the idea that young women in parts of this country don’t know that they have the same choice, or worse might not have a choice because of TRAP laws is horrifying to me. It’s shocking and it’s crazy.

EH: How did you hear about the amicus brief and what was the process of signing on to it?

RL: I heard about the brief through a colleague who works for an abortion rights group in DC and with whom I’m Facebook friends. She posted on Facebook asking for stories from lawyers. I was in the airport with my husband getting ready to go on vacation when I saw the post but I responded right away. I sent her a message saying that I would be happy to talk but saying basically, “my story is unremarkable. If you’re looking for high drama, this is not it.” She connected me with Paul, Weiss, the firm who wrote the brief, and they sent me a brief questionnaire. I wrote them 2-3 paragraphs about how I had had an abortion and why. I gave them permission to quote me and to use my name and my professional affiliation, the latter two of which appear at the end of the brief. They did not quote directly from my story in the brief because it is so unremarkable.

EH: Have colleagues and friends been supportive since you signed on the brief?

RL: Not that many people really know about it, I don’t think. My husband has, of course known since long before we got married that I had had an abortion and was very supportive of my signing on to the brief. My boss knows because I signed on with my professional affiliation, so I wanted to make sure that the organization would be ok with it. She was fine with it, as I knew that she would be, since we’re a woman’s legal organization. I haven’t actively told anyone else in the office about it as that seems weirdly self-congratulatory, which isn’t the point at all. A few of my colleagues who are more politically active and aware of the brief have reached out. I got one text message from a friend who, out of nowhere it seemed, wrote “I love you. I just really love you.” It turned out that she had just seen the brief. So far, the only responses I have had have been positive, but even if they weren’t I’m proud to add my name and make this small contribution to such a critical case. It’s time we stopped being ashamed. No woman should feel that she ‘deserves the worst that could happen to her’ if she exercises her right to make her own decisions about her health or body. I have no guilt about my abortion. It just needs to be talked about until all that stigma is gone.